Posts from the Author -- On Giving Up

I almost gave up yesterday. 

Something strange happened. Between a sick kid, sick spouse, sick in-laws and a sick self, and then dealing with a lot of other life issues, I kinda sorta let myself NOT think about my story for a while. I had four days off of work, and they all went by in a blur of cartoons and trips to the grocery store where we didn't actually come home with anything to eat.

There was one day, though... Valentine's Day, which was amazing. I actually got to go out on a date with hubby, to a fantastic restaurant, and talk. Of course I talked about my novel, told him that I was struggling with the re-writes, and how, if I only had time, I could really do something special with this thing. And then the conversation went on to something else, and I just stopped thinking about my story.

Flash forward, two days later, and there I was still not thinking about it, and feeling pretty damn good with all that clean head space. I actually got to thinking about other stories, other projects, that I've been setting aside so I can work on the novel. I'd just gotten off the bus and was walking home (this is where I do my best story thinking), and I realized I had no idea where I'd left off my novel edits. I knew I had a big change that I need to go back and make, to fix a major mistake in character motivation. But, after that... total blank space in my head. White noise.

And, I thought, What if I just give up?

I could, you know. This thing is a bear, and I'm not even sure if it's a good bear or an interesting bear. Maybe this isn't the story that pans out and gets me published. Maybe I just need to let this one go...

Ah, that's better. 

For an entire day, I let go of the story, let the string on the balloon slip from my hand and fly off into the ether. Clean head space.

Today, while vacuuming (my second best place for story thinking), I knew where the problem was, and how to fix it. I knew where I was in the story, how much further I needed to go back, and what exactly I should change to make the whole thing that much better. Just like that, I'm back in the game.

One more scene is finished, now. One more step. I'm shuffling forward like a zombie on this story, but at least I'm moving.

And I'm going to finish this thing. Dammit.

All the advice to aspiring writers that I've read lately can be boiled down into two things:

1. If you want to be a writer, then write
and
2. Finish things


Good luck, little story,
LLH